Sunday, April 14, 2013

The discipline issue.

Yesterday, my mummy-friend sent me a link of "high need children" and told me her son seems to fall under all the categories that qualify him as a "high need child".
I looked through the article and suddenly find that Adam is a lot like that recently.
He is demanding and attention-seeking, cannot self-soothe and always needs me to be around to do things for him.

Adam used to adore his younger brother so much, but lately he has been testing our patience.
He snatches whatever toy Ashton is playing with , and recently my father-in-law bought Ashton a walker which we let Adam help choose, but once we had it set up at my in-law's, Adam started claiming the walker as his and refused to let Ashton have a go at it.

He has become demanding, needy and attention-seeking. It makes me extremely fed up because I do not want to resort to something negative which may make him hate me, or worse, hate Ashton.

On a scale of 0-10, 0 being most lenient and 10 being the strictest, I am probably a 2 or 3.
Andy accused me of spoiling him from young, saying that Adam only misbehaves when I'm around because he knows he can get away with it. I think that is not true of course, and I'm very displeased with Andy accusing me like that.

It's not that I spoil Adam too much, but it's just that being a mother, it's contradictory for me to inflict pain on the very ones I'm committed to protect and love.

It's not that I'm not bothered with the boys fighting for toys or attention, it's just that sometimes I think as a parent it is important not to be too quick to jump in and take sides , no matter how tempting it is.
Anyway, these are my sulky, annoying farts...
His train fell off the track and therefore it's the end of the world. 

Upset because he has no toys to play with as Adam has snatched everything away. Sigh.

All that moaning, groaning and whining make my head want to explode.

I know Adam is jealous of having to share all the attention and toys with Ashton, but I'm extremely annoyed with his behaviour.
We (Andy, my in-laws and I) do not practice corporal punishment. Friends who visit find it hard to believe that we do not have a single cane in our home!
We try to give our children the best we can afford (not just the material things), and there is absolutely no reason for Adam to behave like such an ungrateful and annoying shit.

How in the world our grandparents have 10 kids is truly beyond me.

2 comments:

  1. I try to have some 1-to-1 time with the older boy daily (e.g. when baby is napping) and he turns into a real angel. Guess it's natural he wants back the good old days of being the only child. But once the baby is up, the attention-seeking behaviour begins. Haha...

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    Replies
    1. Hi MieVee!
      I spend so much one-on-one time with Adam daily that I'm feeling guilty for leaving Ashton to my maid!
      That's why I dont see why Adam should be throwing tantrums and acting as if he has a terrible life.

      Argh. (pulls thinning hair).
      Veron :)

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