Friday, August 15, 2014

Uninterrupted time with the husband - our Friday date nights.

For a couple of months now, Adam has been requesting to have sleepovers at my in-laws' on Friday nights.
My condition is that he finishes his homework, and in exchange he gets to sleepover and play on my brother-in-law's iPad for a while before bed. (We did away with the iPad at home. Like totally.)
Andy & I get to go on dates on Friday evenings for a couple of hours before fetching Ashton home.
It is a dream arrangement for everybody.

I don't know how other couples do it, but even though it is only for a few hours on every Friday, this alone-time with the husband is much needed and works great for us.
Some time to ourselves without the kids getting into our hair. 
Tonight, we were at Akashi Japanese Restaurant for dinner.

Otoro (fatty tuna belly) and Uni (sea urchin).

The uni is sweet and delish!

Sukiyaki beef noodle set.

I'm in a white-tee-and-ripped-jeans phase right now.
White tee: Gap kids (it has a breast pocket which is so cute)

Ripped jeans: Mango
Orange beaded necklace: eBay
Shoes: Tory Burch wedges
Bag: Hermes Birkin 30

 When I got to my in-laws' after dinner, Adam was finishing the last two questions of his abacus homework without my prompting, both kids had been fed and bathed.
This is one of the better nights where everything is falling in place. Stellar moment when I walked through the door to see Adam beading his abacus. 
I swear, some days are so dark I don't even know how I made it out alive.
When I was little, or maybe in my teenage years, my Mum used to exclaim in exasperation "Wait till you become a mother!"
That was probably the most profound advice she's given me in all her life, and mine.
Wait till I become a mother. That's it.

I am a mum of two boys today, and have been mummy status for slightly over 5 years now.
Nobody has given me any advice about being a good mum.
Well, I know anyone can be a mother. But a good, terrific, nurturing and loving mum, now that's seriously tough shit.
I would think I'm faring OK on some days - the kids hardly get sick, I try to provide them the best nutrition I can afford, I am selective (fussy) about the toys I buy for them (safety first and reputable brands only please), and they don't watch DVDs other than those from Leap Frog.
I must be raising prodigies!
The not-so-ok days are those where I receive feedback from the teacher/ helper/ family member/ part of the village who's helping me raise my kids.
Feedback about how I'm not reading enough to Adam/ Ashton climbed on and flew off the coffee table and hurt himself/ both boys fighting/ child so-and-so did this and that, blah blah blah.
Feedback that make you worry about what you're doing wrongly or inadequately.
Feedback that make you cringe and wonder how your own offspring can be like that.
 Parenting is like taking two baby steps forward, and one step back.
You keep going and going and hopefully one day you look back at your grown-up kids and think you did an OK job after all.
Five years into this mothering job, I'm still absolutely clueless.

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